My wife and I just finished viewing The Taste as we capped the evening with a glass each of a pleasant enough Pinot Grigio (two-and-half-buck-chuck) when my wife announced to me that she would really enjoy one night soon a classic bacon, lettuce, and tomato sandwich for dinner,

Oh, and with avocado, please,

Now, my wife is very particular with what she wants and in her classic capacity to explain multiple times to me what she wants and expects. While she realizes that her expectations have put me into a niche of classic cooking where the only shine she wants or expects is in the execution, she invites me to put whatever spin I want on my sandwich.

She knows that I like to play with my food, so while the initial conversations we had that evening were genteel enough, the fact that I was furiously looking for the established classic recipes online–as well as the infinite variations, really got her nervous.

“No, no, this is what I want!” she states with categoric certainty. The fact that I, by this point, am pushing her envelope simply ‘having a conversation’ which revolves around the utter multitude of variants on this theme already has her nervous. I remind her that we are simply talking–that if I, for instance, were to discuss ‘what would it be like’ on the topic, one (she) shouldn’t think that I’m planning anything varied, just…making conversation.

So I forego my discussion from reading about jalapeños, diced onions, and (believe it or not) foie gras included in some recipes and leave her to her reading.

She still wants avocado…and I still want to put my own non-orbit-wrecking spin on the dish. I mentioned guacamole…I could see the hairs on her neck raise like tiny erections on her neck (no, I’m too cruel), so I simply back off.

Here’s the plan and the ingredients:

– wheat bread, toasted lightly brown
dry-cured bacon rather than packaged, store-bought
– mayonnaise (won’t bother with hipster favorites, just what we have in the fridge)
– bib lettuce (which may have the flavor but not the crunch of less flavorful iceberg)
– beefsteak tomatoes…if available this time of the year…otherwise I’ll ask the produce guys which is the currently most flavorful toms they’ve got. Hopefully a pretty heirloom variety in yellow or mottled green!
– salt, pepper
– avocado, thinly sliced over the bacon to add a nice creaminess
– possibly buttering both pieces of toasted bread–we will see.

Mine will be fairly similar, though I plan to add some pickled jalapeños to my mayo and use the food processor to incorporate it for a bit of heat to mine. Not a lot…just a hint. The avocado may take down the heat to a degree.

To complement this meal, I think I have some latitude. Typical to go with this sandwich would be a simple slaw of some kind, but that is where I think I’ll take a couple of extra turns in reaching surprise. Cabbage, scallion, carrot in mayo and vinegar and sugar is expected.

How can I change that up?

–cont’d

PS–I hit Tribu today to catch up on the morning pastries there. Usually I make scones because, well…they’re easily prepared and frozen and are practical for a cafe environment. Muffins, while tasty, need to be baked and then frozen or refrigerated, and its my understanding that muffins don’t take that well to such extremes. Hence–scones.

Today I simply made two different lots of scones separately, rather than making all the dough at first, separating into two base doughs, and adding ingredients to each half. This way I was able to make the scones in the stand mixer and incorporate the separate ingredients. A bit more work, but folding in blueberries and coconut into prepared dough is just plain ugly and stupid. Moreover, the consistency of the dough was much better and easier to handle.

Also–with the almonds and chocolate chip scones, in a perfect world I would have toasted the almonds first to bring out their flavor, but there is no real facility there to toast them in any case, and it would involve time…which means money (extra labor) so–one learns.

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